Saturday

Vegan Valentine - Episode I

Alice Edy We Are what we do
Alice Edy is the talented illustrator of this beautiful heart, for Verb.

Valentine's Day is coming up, and I hate all the commercial clap trap that is pushed as real love, or even lust. What total bloody nonsense. Buying landfill, ugly red items, tons of sugary stuff, dairy laced products and poorly designed, symbolic-heart-abundant aesthetic abominations does not equal love to me. Love is how you treat one another, not in any form of materiality.

That said, I still like to do something. I usually cook us something special, light the candles, pick some flowers, bake some cookies and write a letter. Maybe, if I'm feeling racy, I'll buy Ryan a great second hand book from Bookdealers. I love to celebrate love. Love is such a beautiful thing. Romantic love, even more special - and tenuous. It's a tightrope of keeping the right balance of romance in the face of years of familiarity. It's something one has to work at. The most romantic things of all are the little things that show you care about each other, every single day.

Valentine's Day is therefore just an excuse for me to torture Ryan with mushiness, and making him sit at the dinner table and stop obsessing over work for two hours. If I can manage to keep him at the table that long.

Where I'm going with this, is that Vegans make for better lovers. Take a look at this article where they list the qualities that determine why. What they left off is that vegans taste better. And so do their parts. You know. Those parts. And the resulting excitement. I've had loads of backup on this from friends who have pleasured Vegan boys and girls, in comparison to non-Vegans. Vegans make for yummier, healthier, better smelling lovers. And they tend to be really attentive to one another's needs - they're already the type of people who REALLY give a damn about others - it's science.

So go forth, don't buy landfill and kaggel-kakkies for your liefie. Make love, bake cookies, pick flowers and write letters. And show them that you love them every single day.

PS. My dogs are also getting Valentines gifts, because I love them too. Not like that. But you know what I mean. And MAN do they LOVE treats.

Addendum: Something else that makes everyone taste better is fruit. Eat pineapples, watermelon and strawberries all week, and voila! You'll taste awesome.

I have some hamster friends from BuzzFeed that also have some recommendations on what not to eat on Valentine's day.

Read Vegan Valentine - Episode II - Romantic JHB Restaurants.
Read Vegan Valentine - Episode III - Chocolate
Read Vegan Valentine - Episode IV - Heart
Read Vegan Valentine - Episode V - Fun

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